He was wearing a rug

As I trotted off at lunch time today, an unusual-looking man came in my general direction. I subconsciously did a double take. He was wearing a rug. On his head!

Not to sound heartless and callous and generally insensitive to the plight of those who are challenged in the hair department, but come on! This rug was screaming, LOOK AT ME, I'M AS FAKE AS PAMELA ANDERSON'S CHEST!

If you're going to adorn the top of your shining dome with a toupee, invest in a good one at least. This one was crooked. And there was a solid line near his forehead. And it looked like it had been made from a scalped brunette Barbie. Very unnatural. Very unsettling.

And to top it off, I think he had some 'work' done as well. Maybe from the same place where he bought his $2 rug. The reason I did a double take was because this elderly gentleman had a look on his face as though he'd just seen a ghost. Or perhaps his reflection in a nearby reflective mirror. Not sure which. But his skin was pulled tightly back. Very peculiar.

Now before you send me hate mail, allow me to elaborate: I have absolutely nothing against a little nip here, a little tuck there, and maybe a few Botox injections. If we have the know-how, then go for it. If it makes you feel better about yourself, more confident, then a gold star for you. But this was just excessive. And very scary looking. Trust me.